Valentine's Day is here and it's always good to show your affection to that special someone!

But for some of us, Valentine's Day can be a painful reminder of a relationship that went wrong; a sad statistic of modern day life is that 50% of first marriages and nearly a third of all marriages end in divorce.

A number of high profile divorce cases (such as the one ongoing between Paul McCartney and Heather Mills) have put the financial pitfalls of divorce into the spotlight.

Aside from the obvious emotional trauma associated with splitting up, the financial consequences of divorce can be disastrous:

- In legal fees alone, divorce is an expensive business; according to legal services firm Epoq, the average cost of legal fees for an undefended divorce is, around £1,000.

- A do-it-yourself divorce can have an even more modest price-tag. Supermarket giant Tesco sells a "separation and divorce kit" (no really it does!) a "comprehensive kit packed with the forms and advice you need to conduct your divorce ... without the expense of a solicitor", according to www.tescolegalstore.com for a mere £14.99

- Other sites, such as www.quickie-divorce.com and www.managed-divorce.co.uk, claim to remove both the hassle and reduce the cost of a legal separation.

- You also need to consider the cost of the splitting of assets and the fact that the taxman could add insult to injury by penalizing you unless you get it right. This means that the cost of divorce could be greater then you feared.

Pre nup anyone?

Unsurprisingly, (as we tend to follow Americans in trends), there has been a growing interest in pre-nuptial agreements.

(We desperately hope however, that if your beloved popped the question on February 14, you didn't get a legal document attached to the ring!)

The number of couples taking out pre-nups has soared 500% in the five years, Epoq says, while a recent Grant Thornton survey of 100 lawyers specializing in family law points to a rise in demand for pre-nup services, fuelled by big money divorce cases. It is usually, in the richer party's interest to have a pre-nup, but you do not have to have the super-rich status of Paul McCartney for a pre-nup to be worthwhile.

Such agreements are also recommended in cases where:

* One party comes to the relationship with pre-existing wealth.

* One party is likely to inherit substantially during the marriage.

* Parties are marrying for the second time, or have children from first marriages who need to be provided for.

* The parties are unlikely to have children.

No pre nup?

- Not having a pre-nup could bring some unexpected results, especially in the case of second marriages: your assets could be granted to people you do not expect, such as children from your spouse's previous marriage instead of your own children.

- However, unlike in the U.S. and some other EU countries, pre-nups are not legally binding and are likely to be ignored by the courts in cases where unmentioned children are involved; their interests are always put first.

- In addition, pre-nups are often taken into account when childless marriages come to an end, especially if both parties received independent legal advice and signed the document at least 21 days before their wedding day.

- To have the best chance of being considered, pre-nups should include full disclosure of both parties' assets, including those held offshore and those that you particularly want to shield from the other party, and arrangements if the marriage produces children.

What's up with "mid-nups" and "post-nups"?

You may not have heard of them, but "mid-nups" and "post-nups" are also becoming more common, and they have to appear reasonably fair to stand a chance of being taken into account by a court.

However, Lisa Fabian Lustigman, a family lawyer at Withers concedes that:

"These are far less likely to stand up in court. The reason for this is simple: a judge will set aside any pre-nuptial agreement if they consider it to have been signed under any form of undue pressure, and the same principle applies to mid and post-nuptial agreements. Such pressure is easy to imagine in the case of a mid-nuptial agreement: one party may feel they have to sign the agreement or a separation will follow.

"Likewise, post-nuptial agreements may well be signed in less than cordial circumstances, leaving them open to challenge. But if you're determined to press ahead, the advice is very similar: both parties must be independently advised and both must make full financial disclosure."

As well as safeguarding your wealth from your spouse, should you part ways, keeping your money out of the taxman's clutches should also be a high priority for you!

Transferring assets between married couples and civil partners can be incredibly tax-efficient, but you should think twice before doing so.

As an example, putting shares in your spouse's name might seem a prudent tax move at the time if they are a lower-rate or non tax payer, but it might well come back to haunt you when they are retained by your partner upon divorce. Unless steps are taken, you can find that the Treasury benefits from the splitting of your assets, the most valuable of which tends to be the matrimonial home.

Proceeds from the sale of the main private residence are tax-free, but if one of you has not lived in the property for three years or more prior to the actual divorce, you will be hit with a tax liability.

Divorce done; what should you do?

If you do get divorced, you should take other sensible measures.

• Divorce invalidates any will written since the wedding, so you need to make a new one. If you don't, you will die intestate and your assets might not be divided as you would have wished.

• Also consider a power of attorney, a document authorising someone else to act on your behalf; arguably the second most important document you can sign after a will.

• Joint financial arrangements should also be sorted out. Contact your current account, credit card and loan providers to inform them of your change in circumstances. If you have an account in your name, with an ex-partner as an additional signatory or card holder, make sure you get back any credit cards and cheque books; or you will be responsible for their spending!

• Then, contact a credit reference agency, such as Experian, Equifax or Callcredit, to get a "notice of disassociation" put on your credit file. Fail to do so, and whatever your ex-partner does can affect your credit file for the next six years.

We think it's worth you taking some time to read Love and money; 6 handy tips for couples!